Friday, March 30, 2007
way way too muchyou know you have been doing too many essays
when you automatically open a word file to plan for the sunday worship session
tis sad
10:17 PM
heaven in a wildflower
Thursday, March 29, 2007
through testy timeshide me now
under Your wings
cover me
within Your mighty hands
-chorus-
when the oceans rise and thunders roar
i will soar with You above the storm
Father You are king over the flood
i will be still, know You are God
find rest my soul
in Christ alone
know His power
in quietness and trustOne thing God has spoken, two things have i heard: that you, O God are strong, that you, O Lord, are loving.
psalms 62: 11-12a
11:04 PM
heaven in a wildflower
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
misunderstanding of the week*my grandparents birthday dinner
i took a picture of my cousin and younger sister using my phone
younger sister wants the pic
so she bluetooth-ed it over to her phone
esther: aiyah..its so pixelated here
7 yr old cousin: what...i dun look like a pig!
esther and i: HAHA..its piXelated not piGGGG
she didnt look convinced at all
8:00 PM
heaven in a wildflower
Monday, March 26, 2007
tis the season to grow olderbetween the beginning of april and the end of may
there are something like 9 birthdays celebrations in my mom's immediate family
so we usually cut cake like every week or something
the dinner for my grandparents begin the rounds of celebrations
and we held it yesterday
and the list follows
grandparents: both somewhere in early april. exact date not known
9 yr old cousin: 7th
me: 22th
4 yr old cousin: 27th
__ yr [cannot disclose right] old aunty:30th
my dad and brother: 13th may
my younger sis: 30th
*so my grandparents have to spend a fortune on angpows for their grandkids
my own family still does the mee sua thing for birthdays
so over abt 5 weeks we would eat it 3 times
thank God my dad and brother share the same date
cant believe im reaching 20 in less than a month's time
quite scary how time passes
9:04 AM
heaven in a wildflower
Friday, March 23, 2007
bad bad studentlast week i left SEA lecture 1 hour early
this week i left early 1 hour early again
by the looks of it..i may skip the entire thing next week
since when did i skip lectures huh
well..last week was cos they were doing this whole advertising thing for SEA studies prog
like the lecture was 50mins are the rest devoted to publicity
i sat through all of 20 mins i think
before leaving when they were changing speakers
kinda felt that there wasnt much of a point staying all the way
i know it wasnt a really great thing to do
but what i saw outside was worse
the tea food were already fully set up
and the people who left the lt were shamelessly standing there and eating!
fine..the food was catered for you but if you wanna eat your fill, sit through the talk
or take a small piece and leave immediately
quite amazing..the kind of behaviour we are capable of
this week was cos of the geog majors' tea session from 3 to 5
and i wanted to go for it
so i sat at the last row and left during the break
majors' tea was not bad..pretty interesting
thought the part when we were splited into groups was quite good
members of the dept sat with us for "informal" discussions
although most people were pretty uptight and quiet
my group had the head of the dept with us
she's a cool lady..not some ditzy academic too geeky for her own good kind
next week
geog fieldtrip to STB
havent decided if im going for it since i am supposed to have lecture then
plus there are limited spaces
and i havent signed up for it yet..
8:11 PM
heaven in a wildflower
Thursday, March 22, 2007
more abt school againthe terrible period is more or less over already
handed in the 2 main group projects on tuesday
had a very minor hiccup which thanks to erica was rectified:)
i dunno but i feel a little slacky without them around now
but i shall not complain
still have 2 more term papers to do
a solo SEA paper and a trio group thing
plus one more group presentation and report
everything would be over on 5th april
which thankfully isnt too far away
however, it means the exams are coming again verrrryyyy sooooonnnn
this sem has moved by like super duper quickly
hardly had time to catch my breath for a bit
or do my mountains of readings [but still had time to go online and blog:)]
had various group meetings like everyweek
spent alot of time writing individual essays or parts of essays
after a while..it gets really sian and you just want to get done with it
forget the fanciful english and varied sentence structures
have to pull up the CAP this sem
and well..its way harder than last sem
and i had a B for my only mid term test [ok for me and that module]
hope my groups would do pretty well for the projects
i think we did put in alot of effort in them
now..to get back to work..
hopefully
1:40 PM
heaven in a wildflower
Monday, March 19, 2007
why families are getting smallercos its so disgustly expensive to live in Singapore!
esp for medical treatment
in this month alone..
my family spent a bomb on medical related stuff
like slightly over 1k
appalling aint it
they were not even emergency stuff that kind of thing
just very expensive procedures..
sigh
my poor parents have to pay for everything..
and a little thing to blog about
I DROPPED MY LAPTOP TODAY!
from a height of about 0.5m
i was shifting its position when it slipped form my hands
lucky i was at home already..but it was the marble floor which is very hard
*sob sob*
i quickly picked it up and started pleading..
"i know i dropped you but pls..dun die on me tonight..i have work to hand in tmr.."
my brother gave me the "you are so crazy" look
but..desperate times call for desperate measures
anyway..it still working fine:) phew
10:39 PM
heaven in a wildflower
Friday, March 16, 2007
better nowafter talking to 2 very important people
i feel much better now
i just needed to vent everything out
frankly i was quite surprised about the level of emotions that surfaced
the day before and more so last night
i havent been that angry about things in a very long time
but that is still one more person to talk to
the most important person
i had actually thought of removing the "angry" post
cos not nice mah
but on hindsight i'll leave it here
as a reminder of how quick to anger i am and the dangers of pride
there is so much i need to learn
12:36 AM
heaven in a wildflower
Wednesday, March 14, 2007
slightly messed up insideignorance is bliss
yet we are "kaypoh" by nature
plus some other things which i cant articulate now
feeling slightly guilty, indignant and plain p*ssed about stuff
it will pass
soon enough
10:21 PM
heaven in a wildflower
Sunday, March 11, 2007
look back in _________*taking inspiration from glori's blog
the third generation one
we never only grow physically older and larger. we definitely mature alongside too, hopefully shedding our childish ways and replacing them with grown-up behaviours and mindsets. this gradual change is usually for the better and should be anticipated and in a certain way, celebrated.
many times, we look back at the past with delightful memories, faint asumement, sheepish-ness and slight embarrassment. we wonder how could we be so shallow then, focusing so intently on minute things which clearly have lost their importance. its common to realise we squirm when we remember and read blog archives [if available]. how was that person me? how did that play a part in making me today?
i too have a love-hate relationship with my blog archives. granted it only chronicles parts of my life since july 2005 but it saw me through alot of changes. jc student, kindergarten helper, pl relief teacher, nus student, church tuition teacher.. i like reading through what i have written before although there are entries which i cannot bear and i'll scroll over rapidly. similar to glori, i cringe at my poor former childish self and writing.
yet..we would always be looking back. old blogs new blogs. yesterdays todays tomorrows. are we supposed to look back and scorn ourselves? for tomorrow we would be scorning today's self. we do not live each day, or write about each day only to laugh at ourselves in the future.
the past is over, is funny, is trashy but it was/is necessary. it is the basis for self reflection. it has a part in moulding who we are today and tomorrow. whatever we think as hopelessly trival upon hindsight was important then and rightly so. the limited vocab and expression then should be expected. its all part of the essential and inescapable process of growing up. we learn from the past - good experiences and bad mistakes.
"..also sometimes am amazed at how the human mind spins through a journey of wonderous change" [tan, 2007 - i couldnt resist:)] says it beautifully. and personally i hardly think she had a pittance of vocabulary before but thats another issue.
how do you look back?
i leave you to fill in the blank yourself.
9:12 PM
heaven in a wildflower
Saturday, March 10, 2007
4-eyed againi have taken to wearing specs alot more often recently
many people in uni were so surprised i actually wear them
find it slightly strange..arent the rims of the lenses fairly obvious in the eyes?
3 reasons for reverting to specs again..
-my degree has gone up so my contacts are not accurate anymore.
wearing my contacts for long can give me headaches esp in school
-i do like my new specs. it fits better than my previous pair
-they were quite ex that i better give them more mileage
well..it should stay this way till i make a new pair of contacts
and a very insignificant thing that is driving me nuts
my 'D' key on my keyboard is stuck [for lack of a better word]
there seems to be something stuck underneath it
i tried tilting my laptop in all directions and whacking it but the "thing" refuses to dislodge
now if i need to type the letter 'd' i must hit it really really hard
and alot of times it doesnt appear the first time
so instead of "and" i get "an" multipled by all the words that need the letter
which is pretty much..
how?
8:48 PM
heaven in a wildflower
Friday, March 09, 2007
well protected, well plannedwhat SEA films accidentally taught me..
to be grateful for and to God
we watched a couple of films dealing with the folk beliefs of SEA
namely - traditional magic, ghostly beliefs, SEA religions and luck issues
i admit to be a scaredy cat for anything vaugely horror
the usual "horror kind of music" is enough to make me avert my eyes alreay
and i didnt like the shows, esp today's
it was lame and totally not oscar material but thats not the point
i still couldnt bring myself to watch parts of it
after it i really thanked God for being him
so i neednt be afraid of such stuff
that He who is in me is greater than he who is in the world
it is a very assuring realisation
i still do not like scary films/books
and i dun see the need to frighten myself unnecessarily at all
but i also know my God watches over me all the time
and things like luck and fate do not decide my life
the One above did it already, long time ago
10:42 PM
heaven in a wildflower
Wednesday, March 07, 2007
proposingits research proposals lah
what were you thinking:)
i think all the geog lecturers "pakak" [were in cahoots] for this sem
all my geog projects are about designing research proposals
[they probably want us to be able to do them backwards next time]
and when you have 3 geog modules, with more than 1 project for some
its a lot of research proposals to do
kinda getting sian of doing it already
good thing is..
what you learn from one module helps another
and things do get quite straightforward after a while
i mean..how many ways are there to write a research proposal right?
not many in case you didnt know
and in other little happenings that make life more interesting..
i finally met py and su zhen today:)
cos i ain't doing any lit modules this sem we havent had common lectures and stuff
we finally bumped into each other yesterday
they finishing lunch and me getting to school a little too early
managed to spend abt 20 mins together i think doing random things
and so..py..rem how i look again right:)
and i skipped my first lecture of this sem yesterday too
esther brilliantly got herself locked out of the house
there is a longer story to it but nah..too long to explain here
and i, being so gallant, had to rush home to rescue her poor miserable soul
come to think of it..she hasnt paid her portion of my cab fare home
well..she promised too..
1:04 PM
heaven in a wildflower
Monday, March 05, 2007
major blunder and some more1. forgetfulness
an extremely forgetful me
equals a very very pissed eugene
cant believe how scatterbrained i was yesterday
i nearly made him "lost it" luckily he's a nice gentleman
just cos of 2 sets of notes [where was my brain man?]
better redeem myself soon
2. food
the just passed cny saw me eating 5 rounds of yu sheng
all that lo-hei-ing..triring man
and i dun really like yu sheng actually
the stuff is too pickled for me
i like the salmon and the crackers only
love grating the veggies though:)
3. essays [couldnt find an 'f' for it]
so many to do:(
handed in 1 already
and the rest are due from this friday till early april
good thing there wasnt many midterm tests
8:16 PM
heaven in a wildflower
Saturday, March 03, 2007
jealousy or the lack ofthere are 2 groups of people you will never be jealous of
1. your sliblings
2. your kids [no first hand experiences though]
*as said by my mom before
**and esther adds that its cos you can take some credit for their achievements too
well..maybe there would be bouts of envy occassionally
but at the end, you can never feel the bitterness of jealousy with them
anyway esther did pretty well for the As
whats new actually right?
plus she did work hard for it
so she should be on her way to a scholarship too i hope
she hopes as well
and from what my mom told me
agnes did great for her exams too
as in the masters exam that was in jan this year, not the As eons ago
and again what actually is new right?
woe is me
the terrible fate of having 2 smart-ass sisters
hehe..
12:38 PM
heaven in a wildflower
Thursday, March 01, 2007
my tributeHow can I say thanks for the things you have done for me?
Things so undeserved, yet You gave to prove your love for me.
The voices of a million angels could not express my gratitude.
All that I am and ever hope to be I owe it all to thee.
To God be the glory, to God be the glory,
To God be the glory, for the things He has done.
With His blood He has saved me
With His power He has raised me
To God be the glory, for the things He has done.
Just let me live my life and let it be pleasing Lord to theeAnd should I gain any praise let it go to Calvary.With His blood He has saved me,
With His power He has raised me
To God be the glory for the things He has done.
To God be the glory, to God be the glory,
To God be the glory, for the things He has done.
With His blood He has saved me
With His power He has raised me
To God be the glory, for the things He has done.
the first time i heard this song was when 'Lena Maria' came to Singapore for the concert in 2001 i think. i was amazed that a lady of such severe disablilities could still find the joy to praise God so thankfully. reheard/sang it on the last FT and it really hit me then that truely i have been blessed beyond measure and so much is undeserved. and no credit should ever come to me.
i thanks God for everything
for everything he has given and perhaps not given
for life itself
and for Christ who died that i may live
truely its to God be the glory [pl's favourite phrase:)]
5:06 PM
heaven in a wildflower
