a step at a time


back from camp already:) was home yesterday actually but was too brain dead to blog about it. on the whole the camp was great! learnt many new things, made some new friends, got to know some people better and most importantly i gained new lessons regarding my God. but..im going to dedicate this [long] entry almost entirely to the night walk that we had:)


we spent the better part of sunday at sentosa[scotted there immediately after proper church] had 3 'missions' while there - a scavenger hunt, a night walk and a supposed hike back to church. had a ball of a time and returned to church that night dog tired at 1am. for the record, i slept at about 430am [very possibly even later]that night!


anyway..night walk started just after the sky darkened at about 730. we were briefed about the activity and found out that it was going to be a solo night walk through the 'dragon trail' at sentosa. shall cut the long story short and go straight to my group's turn[we were spilt into 4 groups in the camp]


we were brought by eugene to a certain unrecognisable stop in the trail. made to put on trash bag strips that served as blindfolds for us. we sat in a single file, huddled together in darkeness. eugene gave a more specific briefing regarding what we had to do[walk] and what to expect[darkness?] and what we may see[monitor lizards and snakes?!]. i admit that i was scared but i had to help in assuring the younger ones, some who were really really fearful. to answer the fear of ghosts/demons that somehow could have been lurking in there, eugene very rightly reminded all of us that "HE who is in me is far greater that he who is in the world". the HE being the Holy Spirit.


my turn..eugene came over and pulled me up from my spot. he led me to the starting point and told me to take off my, by now very sweaty, blindfold. he told me my number[24], gave me a pat on the head and i went off. into the unknown and with only lightsticks to guide me through. green for directions, red showing caution and blue for station masters.


walked through the trail. the forest was super duper creepy! i felt as if there were people crouching behind the trees watching me as i walked past. yet, i didnt dare to turn my head to check out if it was just the shadows of the thick vegetation or erm..something else. i started singing any christian song that came to my mind, it was seriously any random song. they helped comfort and calm me down. halfway..i started hearing suspicious noises as if there was someone following me. that totally freaked me out! i was like "%*#%@"[not exactly:)] i kept walking, trying to block the noises out of my head and tell myself that it was just my imagination.


reached the 4th station[shangjun and derek were there]. in a sense, i knew that if there was anything behind me those people at the station could 'save me' so i turned back slightly. a voice came "hey, its elroi here..i was super scared so i walked very fast to catch up with you". at that i was $%&^#@ [not exactly] again. he was scared and ended up scaring me! anyway..they took a photo[with blinding flash] of us and sent elroi on his way before me. i counted to 15 before setting out again. that was just before i heard a very funny walkie talkie conversation:) but i shall be nice and not embarrass my dear group member:)


reached the end point after trekking up some natural steps. was falling over every other step. and my phone rang in the middle of it all. something like a 3rd heartattack of the day! anyway. i found out it was cos i was taking a little too long and they wanted to check where i was.


-lessons learnt-
*mostly my own but some from other people. will specify as i go along


indeed..the short walk mirrors our christian walk. we get taken out of our comfort zones and forced to confront our fears. sometimes we have to walk alone with no one either encouraging us or coming along with us. we face the unknown, solo. perhaps this could be a missionary stepping out into another country without the support of her family. perhaps a person answering the call to ministry knowing thats his parents would never accept his decision. perhaps a christian student entering a new school not knowing what the future holds. we step out alone with only the presence of God with us.


as said earlier there were lightsticks to guide us as we walked. in our walk with God, he leaves little directions in our lives pointing us to the right path. small they may be but in an almost completely dark setting, the light they give was powerful. God indeed is gracious. knowing that we are so prone to giving up once assurances are absent, he leaves 'clues' to remind us of the right way. in the same way that i was glad to see the next lightstick, my prayer is that i would be as eager in receiving directions from my Lord.


there were points in the walk when the next lightstick was not in direct view. it was a little unnerving since the immediate goal was not see-able. very soon, fears like "crap, i think im walking the wrong way" that kinda thing would start. however, a few steps later, the wonderful lightstick lies ahead glowing brightly. this bears testament to the need for faith when we walk. to rely on the knowledge that we are on the God-directed right path even when the future is uncertain.


this bit is from sharon: this dear girl got lost during the walk. she strayed off the path and trotted down the wrong way for quite a while. when she turned back, she followed the first lightsticks that she saw and thus went back to station 4! anyway..she shared later that the experience was getting lost was in a way, good. indeed, it helped to symbolise the time of our lives when we thought that we were self sufficent and hence ceased to follow the 'lightsticks'. yet, somewhere along the way, we got lost and had to crawl back to our Father, humbled by the mistake[s] we made. on her returning to station 4, she linked it to be like walking in circles, temprarily lost within the christian walk. but, with the help of some friends around, we can pick ourselves up again.


as i also said earlier, i was singing to myself as i walked. actually i was singing, praying and freaking out all in the same time! yet..it was humbling to realise that it is only in moments of stress and fear that we are so fervent in praying/singing. when all is well we forget that our walk must not stagnate. God is not only a God of difficult times but of each moment of the day:)


lastly..instead of being the walker only, we are sometimes like the lightsticks. we light the path of fellow christians as they walk. we help shine the way, giving encouragement as they tire and lose heart. so..never think that God cannot do anything with your life. you never know who may have been touched by you. i think lijun or someone else said this.


*thought this song was really apt.
-WE'LL BE FAITHFUL-


Forgetting what lies behind
Setting our hearts on the prize
Always keeping our eyes on our Lord Jesus
We're running the race to win
All the way to the end
Laying down every sin
That would seek to hinder us.

And we'll be faithful to our calling
For You are able to keep us from falling
For in Your promise, we will trust
You'll be faithful to finish the work
You began in us.


thus ends this blog entry. indeed i learnt much from the experience. hopefully, this would not just remain in my head by i would somehow apply in life. i know that this entry has plenty of grammar and perhaps spelling mistakes..try to not be too affected by them k:)